New Struggles

It has been so long since I have blogged what the Lord has been teaching me on here. Maybe it is because I haven't really wanted to learn it. God called my husband and I to move to a new place and to start a new job. The calling was clear and yet I was still reluctant to leave. I left my family, my friends, my support system, my routines, my home, my perfect weather to support my husband in his calling to be a pastor. And since we have arrived all I have done is complain. It is funny because even reading this I realize how selfish and childish I sound...MY home, MY friends, MY weather. MY, MY, MY. It's all about me, me, me when it is supposed to be about HIM, HIM, HIM.

This makes me think about King Nebuchadnezzar. You can read about him in the book of Daniel. Basically he was a very successful king who had lots of accomplishments. He took credit for all of his work and did not credit God with any of it. And God gave him plenty of chances.

First Nebuchadnezzar had a dream about the future and no one was able to interpret it until Daniel came along and told him the meaning and that the dream was from God. Nebuchadnezzar was in awe and placed Daniel in a high position, but he still did not turn to God. Then Nebuchadnezzar tried to burn Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego alive but God saved them. Nebuchadnezzar even saw a 4th in the fire with them and yet he still did not turn to God. Finally he had another dream about a great tree and in the dream he saw a messenger:

Daniel 4:13-17 “In the visions I saw while lying in bed, I looked, and there before me was a holy one, a messenger, coming down from heaven. He called in a loud voice: ‘Cut down the tree and trim off its branches; strip off its leaves and scatter its fruit. Let the animals flee from under it and the birds from its branches. But let the stump and its roots, bound with iron and bronze, remain in the ground, in the grass of the field.

“‘Let him be drenched with the dew of heaven, and let him live with the animals among the plants of the earth. Let his mind be changed from that of a man and let him be given the mind of an animal, till seven times pass by for him.

“‘The decision is announced by messengers, the holy ones declare the verdict, so that the living may know that the Most High is sovereign over all kingdoms on earth and gives them to anyone he wishes and sets over them the lowliest of people.’


Daniel interpreted this dream and warned the king that he was the tree and that if he did not turn to God that he would be thrown out from his kingdom and wander like an animal for 7 years. The king STILL did not turn to God and a year later this is exactly what happened. He wandered like an animal for 7 years until he finally praised God and the Lord restored Nebuchadnezzar back to his throne.

So I know I need to learn the lesson that Nebuchadnezzar did. I am learning about faith and trusting in God's plan over my own. I know God is in control. I have seen His miracles. I recently gave birth to a baby who the doctors said I was miscarrying! God is bigger than what I want. I long for the comfort of my home but at the same time I know I am where God wants me to be. Maybe, like Nebuchadnezzar, I was a tree that got too big and needed to be chopped down so that I could learn to rely on God.

Don't miss out on the lessons God is teaching you. He knows everything and is everywhere.

Psalm 139
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 You have searched me, LORD,
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you, LORD, know it completely.
5 You hem me in behind and before,
and you lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place,
when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
all the days ordained for me were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand—
when I awake, I am still with you.

19 If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, LORD,
and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.